D has now had two visits at the Rees-Jones Center for Foster Care at Children's in Dallas. His general health is great. He grew 1/2 an inch and lost 3 pounds between visits! The doctor was pleased with his BMI improvement. D is not on any meds and is a normal active 6 year old.
However, D's dental visit at Children's Pediatric Dental Clinic surfaced serious dental problems. It is clear that D had major dental issues as we can see that many baby teeth have been extracted and there are caps on all remaining back molars. These caps did not protect the baby molars and he will need to have 9 back teeth removed. I stood and cried as the dentist showed me all the decay. Given the number of extractions, we have day surgery scheduled for Tuesday, June 26. It appears his permanent teeth are all okay and his first set of molars are coming though as expected - thank goodness! It will take the next few years for his teeth to get to a normal state.
While I have medical authority as the foster parent, I do have to get approval from CPS for D to go under anesthesia. So I have talked with my JP Caseworker, the CASA Volunteer and the CPS CVS Caseworker and sent out emails with the dental report. The CVS Caseworker is required to get her Supervisor to approve and I know her Supervisor recently quit so she has new one. I have also asked the CVS Caseworker to ask D's family for any dental history and to tell them about what is happening. I am hoping to talk with D's family at the Friday Family Visit this week to explain. The CVS Caseworker will not be there this week so I will have to figure out the best way to have this conversation.
I am working on an eating approach. D is fairly limited in what he likes to eat and definitely has a high carb preference. He is not going to have back molars to chew with for quite some time, he has no front top teeth and he is about to start loosing his bottom baby teeth. The dentist has said absolutely only white milk and water to drink. Honestly, I am quite anxious about how this will impact his eating and diet. I working on ideas and a plan to get him proper nutrition.
Significant Situation #2- D's Mom
The other major change is that D's Mom has been at the last two Family Visits. On June 8th, we got notification about one hour before that she would be at visit so I was able to prepare D. The joy of seeing D reunited with his mother was magnificent. She is very young, loves her children and is a frankly victim herself. D was tearful at the first separation but he recovered quickly. The second visit was all about his happiness to be with his family and no tears. Every single day, multiple times a day, we talk about when the next Friday Family Visit will be and seeing his Mom and other family members. His Mom told me she would be taking parenting classes. I know she has to work a court ordered service plan but I have no information on what is in motion. She has some significant obstacles and the situation is complex.
SIDE NOTE: I cannot help but compare D's primal relationship wth his Mom and family as I hear about the devastation being wreaked on children and families at the Texas border. The United States government has willfully traumatized babies, toddlers, kids and teens and most of them will NEVER be the same. This is not politics. This is a moral choice about protecting the basic human rights of our most vulnerable population. There is absolutely no middle ground for me. I condemn Trump, Sessions and the administration for the zero-tolerance policy and the impacts thus far and in the future; do not be fooled that the Executive Order yesterday has stopped the cruelty.
Other Quick Updates
- D went to Lonesome Dove Camp June 2 to June 4. It is a summer sleep away camp for foster kids run by a local church. He had SO much fun. They did ALLOT into 2.5 days: horseback riding, swimming, fishing, crafts, games and a individual "birthday party" for each of the 40 campers. He came home with a photo album with pictures of him doing all his activities. The sponsors really thought through what would be meaningful to these kids of trauma.
- Oldest Son graduated from high school so lots of events around him in early June. He helped with D for the 2nd week of June. Oldest Son drove away on June 15 from home (sniff sniff) to drive across the country for his summer jobs working at debate camps at Georgetown (Washington DC) and Michigan State.
- Youngest Son is busy 6 days a week working as Sports Counselor at JCC and volunteering on Saturdays at Children's Medical Center.
- We have been dealing with some other changes too so lots happening in our home!
The Foster Care Team Update
0) Placement Update - There is a kinship home study being conducted so D and his toddler brother can possibly move in with a relative. Kinship care is like foster care but with a relative of the foster child. The home study is with the paternal aunt and initial steps have been completed. The aunt must move into a larger home the have the legally required amount of space for D and his toddler brother. The judge did not order this home study so there are also steps that must be taken with the judge.
1) Jonathan's Place (JP) Caseworker (Agency Caseworker) - NEW UPDATE - I have been in touch with our JP Caseworker but no major events have occurred.
2) CVS Caseworker (CPS Conservatorship Caseworker) - NEW UPDATE - CVS Caseworker is required to meet with D once per month. She met him on May 24th. She also transported him to a family visit on June 1 which counts as the official June visit. She is not present at most family visits. She responds when I reach out and is friendly.
3) Guardian Ad Litem (Attorney for the foster child) - NEW UPDATE - The Guardian Ad Litem met D on Saturday (May 12th) at our home. I have not heard from him since but I have been told that he approved the kinship placement.
4) CASA Volunteer (Child advocate volunteer) - NEW UPDATE - CASA Volunteer has been to a June Family Visit at CPS. She also picked up and took D to Chucky Cheese last Monday, June 18. D was SO excited. I have definitely grown to appreciate her interactions with D and us. I consider her a stronger part of our Foster Care Team.
5) Therapist Evaluation - NEW UPDATE -We got a call from the therapist (finally) and she will be at our house on Monday June 25 to meet with D.
6) Biological Family - NEW UPDATE -The biological family for D includes Mom, Dad, grandmothers, an aunt, cousins and other young relatives. D also has a toddler brother in another foster care home. We have Family Visits every Friday at 2pm at CPS. BIG update is the Mom is now able to join the visits and has been to last two.
7) Judge - NEW UPDATE -The Judge is ultimately the decision maker for just about everything. The last court date was June 8. The next court check point is scheduled for October 2018. There will have to be special court date(s) requested to process the kinship placement. The Judge will also need to define service plan for Mom to get kids back.
8) CPS 3rd Party Home Study Entity - NEW UPDATE - CPS contracts with 3rd parties to conduct home studies. Initial home visit completed for kinship placement.
9) Foster Sitters - NEW UPDATE -We have certified Foster Sitter #1 along with Oldest Son and Youngest Son certified. We have several other sitters still in motion. It is a PROCESS.
