It is uncomfortable to know what to say when people you care about are going through a hard time. There are those lovely souls who have a gift for comforting others. But many of us are just fumbling through with good intentions.
And it is not always obvious what is going on with people. And even when you do know then you do not really know. Why is this so hard?
How do we show the depth and breadth of our pain and not jeopardize our ability to achieve basic needs?
How can we be vulnerable when that very vulnerability alienates us?
The cumulative effect of trauma is real and it changes you. Sometimes you get so damaged that full recovery seems impossible. Seems is another word for hope.
We are there for others in a way that becomes serial. Person after person until you stop. And then you realize it was really just a lifelong search disguised.
The act of healing can feel like a never ending process in a finite life.
